Infinite wisdom of Kathy Lee and Hoda

Yeah I put Hoda and Kathy Lee in the same sentence as wisdom. I'm going to block this out of my memory permanently.

But I was watching their hour of tv one day (by mistake) and they were talking about all of their weight loss tips, which are usually useless. But like many women I am always on the hunt for ideas to get rid of that 5 to 7 to 10 pounds that just won't go away. They suggested buying yourself a reward for reaching a weight goal, which seems good to me. And this is how the conversation about this subject went with my husband:

Me: So I think I need something to help me lose weight.
Husband: I don't think a colonic is the answer.
Me: Ha Ha. Very funny.
Husband: Well honey don't you think laying on the beach for a week (we're planning a honeymoon) is enough? If that doesn't make you want to lose weight, then I don't know what will.

...Shit. That didn't cross my mind. I was thinking a new pair of skinny jeans.

Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing

That is a fabulous book, in case you never read it. It will probably take 45 minutes if you're reading it as an adult. At least, that's what I've noticed from reading elementary level books as an "adult."

Anyways. I had the most ridiculous day working in a 4th grade class the other day. Seriously. The class was good but they were SO LOUD. SO LOUD. So loud that another teacher came in to yell at them, which went a little something like this:

Random teacher: OMFG BLAH BLAH BLAH STFU! (roughly)
Whole class: dead silent
Random teacher retreats to her cave
Girl in my class: Everyones a critic...!
Me (the adult): Dies of laughter.

Seriously? What is this? Haha. Also, a pic I sent to my friend to illustrate my day:

bloooooog!

Yep. I have one. Like everyone else in the world. I actually made this for a masters class I was taking, but an unfortunate turn of events (aka firing) made me give up my degree again. Stupid masters. Anyway, I though that since I have one I might as well use it... right?

Except that I don't have anything interesting or funny to say. Because a blog needs to be at least one of those things. Preferably both. Right?

I don't really know.

Isn't this riveting? I think so.

I just took a break from writing to look at facebook photos. Why does facebook have such a hold on me?

So now I'm going to post something slightly more interesting. I really could post a picture of a rock and accomplish this goal. But you're not going to be so lucky.

Things I want to do before I die:
1. Ball drop in Times Square
2. Safari in Africa
3. Go to Casablanca. Hey, Morocco is the new Abu Dhabi. SATC3? I think so.
4. Rent a villa in Italy. Preferably next to George Clooney's.
5. Go to Paris and Venice with someone I actually like. IE my husband.
6. Have kid(s).
7. Go to Washington DC.
8. Skydiving
9. Finish my masters
10. Have a career
11. Be famous. Just kidding.
12. Have more consistent use of periods. Obviously a problem.
13. Make friends.
14.

Damn. I was hoping to get to 20. Maybe I'll add more later!